Virginity is a medical term which has become a character certification for women and only for women! Is Virginity really a character certificate made only for Women, which they need to pass to prove themselves and get a clean chit? Well, just because medically a ruptured hymen defines the virginity of a woman, they are made to go through all this Drama. And, as there is no such way to define the virginity of a man, they are set free. Our society doesn’t stop here, they question the character of women with ruptured hymen or those who fail the test of virginity, especially when it comes to marriage.
This is the ugly truth of this male chauvinist society. No man is ever asked or has to go through the test of virginity, but virginity has become a character certificate for women. Let’s have a further look at what kind of situations a girl has to face, when it comes to the test of Virginity!
Indian Men and their families are keen on marrying a virgin girl!
Believe it or not! Specially in Indian arrange marriages, Many boys, tries to dig out directly or indirectly, if the girl in front has had been in physical relationship or relationships. Open any sexologist column and you would find questions like, I found my wife is not virgin on the first night, what do I do now?, I feel cheated and bla bla….
Well, as a girl I believe there can only be two kinds of men behind this sick thought. First- The one who has never ever been in a relationship with a girl, or have not got the privilege of getting a girlfriend and have stayed in the FRIENDZONE all their life. He might be frustrated and looking for a life partner who can never know about his fears and weaknesses. Second- The one who has had numerous between the sheets actions with different girls and now when it comes to settling down and getting married. His past is haunting him and he wants a girl who is untouched. Whatever, the reason may be, staying virgin or not is a person’s personal wish. And a non-virgin, be it a man or a girl doesn’t make them characterless.
Need not to say, this so called male chauvinist society has no rights to question the character of a woman or a girl, based on virginity!
Old Traditions to test the Virginity of the bride!
This might seem weird, but it is very much true. Being an Indian, I have heard that in many communities, brides were and rarely even today are forced to undergo a test of virginity on their first night itself, under the name of the traditions. Brides either have to wear a white saree on their first night or a white bed sheet is laid on the bed. Mother in law or sister in law used to come back in the morning to check, if there are any blood stains on the saree or the bed sheet to confirm the virginity of the bride.
Although, many communities still follow the tradition of wearing white or laying white sheets, but this tradition of coming back to check the virginity of the bride, doesn’t exist as such. But there are many such traditions still prevailing in many communities all over the world.
Raped girls, Widows and divorcee women are not accepted for marriages easily
Just the sick thought that raped girls, widows and divorcee women are no more virgins, they are rejected for marriage proposals. Whereas, rapists, widower and divorcee man are freely accepted by our society. Our society is so biased. The rights given to women and men are so different. Only women are forced to sacrifice and get humiliated.
Why only women need to certify their Character with their Virginity?
Is it just because, it is easier for men to know, if the woman’s hymen is ruptured or not. Is this the only reason, why only women are questioned about their Virginity? Or, is this just another way of humiliating a woman, in this male chauvinist World? Although, It is now medically proven, that ruptured hymen can be the reason of so many acts like, horse riding, during sports, bike riding, mastur**tion and even some girls are born with a broken hymen. But still, on the first night, every bride is expected to be a virgin.
Why only women?? Is virginity really that important for a girl for character certification?? And, if it is that important, why just women? Why are men not asked for the same character certification? The fact is, whenever a woman is involved in sex before marriage, it is obviously with man. Then why is the Question mark of character only imposed on women?
We are all educated, but only a few of us are literate. It is time that we give the respect and freedom to women and make our society more literate. I am glad that I have many male friends who are literate enough and doesn’t have such narrow minded thoughts, but there are many illiterate educated men in our society.